I feel strange
Almost like I am going
    to explode once more.
Like a lit bomb or a
     missile locked on target.
I don't know why I feel like this.
     Nor do I want to know.
I worry for myself sometimes
     Especially when I feel this
Way. It is unreal, but so
     Real. Maybe I am locked
in a vortex of forever mixing
     emotions. Maybe I need to
sit down one day and figure
     myself out. I am not sure what
it is I need to do. Nor am I
     sure why I am writing now.
Now am I sure why I am
     using this particular style.
I must be going off. Either
     that or I am slipping into
a realm of no reality. I'm
     not too fond of reality. It
fools the mind, body, and soul.
     I am so different from the rest
of them. They are not like me.
     They are not trapped between
fantasy and reality. I am trapped.
     They do not get their hearts twisted.
like I do. I always fall in
      love. But I do not truly know
What love is. I lust after
      what I can have. But I do
want so much. I am afraid of failing.
      I fear not being more than what
they expect of me. I fear losing.
      I hope unlike any other. But
my emotions are too strong anyway.
      I cry easily, I laugh easily, I
hurt easily. I take too much regard
      for the feelings of others. I take
little regard for my own fragile, desperate
      heart. I care very little. I
desire too much. I do not truly love
      myself. I ache. I lie. I want
to be what is my fantasy.
     I need to get back to reality.